Lost in translation and found at a neighbor's house

Sometimes I have "those moments."  I forget something or I incorrectly understand something. 

Did I ever tell you about the time I thought my friend's husband had died?  

I invited my friend and her son over to play at our house a while back.  She texted me back and I understood that she was busy with funeral arrangements because her husband had died.  Obviously I was very upset about it (I double checked with my DH if I had understood correctly) and then called her to express my sympathy.

Sometimes people wear masks. Basically told me she was "great."  I asked her again and again and finally insisted that we get together to talk face to face as soon as she had some time.

 I think it happens in every culture but perhaps since I live here, I especially notice it here.  Masks help conceal real feelings and help people feel more secure.

When I sat down with her I again asked her how she really was doing.  I listened, I tried to be understanding and then basically I asked her how she could be doing "great" when someone had just died.  She explained she wasn't that upset because he had been really distant lately and he was often sick and had been in the hospital.  I knew her husband had been in hospital and I knew he was often get sick.  It didn't surprise me to hear that they weren't very close and didn't communicate.  We talked about death, it's meaning and I also encouraged her to tell her son about it all (he was only told that this person was sick and was in the hospital since she didn't know how to broach the subject of death with a four year old.)

baba / father 

We decided to make an extra effort with her little boy and spend time with him.  So I asked her if I could get him from school one day and bring him over to our house to play (he's the same age as my little man).  She said it was all fine and it was arranged that I would pick him up. I walked up to get this little boy and all of a sudden, I saw the dad.  I'm sure my mouth fell open and that I changed colors.  He handed me his son and I walked him back to my house.  When his mom came to pick him up I sat down with her and told her that sometimes I don't always understand everything.  She looked at me and asked me what I meant.  I said, "who died?"  She said, "my husband's dad.  Who did you think died?"  I explained everything and realized that I must have misunderstood one character in the text message and the whole meaning had changed. I don't think that she was really doing "great" through it all but I am relieved to know that the little boy will grow up with a dad.      
 
Today seems like small potatoes after that incident.

A friend invited me to her house to eat noodles.  There are a LOT of PEOPLE that live in our apartment complex.  Probably like 10,000.  Thankfully this woman and I live in the same building.  But I couldn't quite remember which floor she lives on.  She had just been on her way home when she invited us over.  So I reasoned that the woman must be home and that I must have had the wrong house (because who leaves when her guests haven't arrived yet).  So I figured I had the wrong floor and I went down one floor.   I'm the one with "three kids" and we just naturally bump into people in the elevator.  Parents like their kids to say "HELLO" to us in English and most people know at least one of my kid's names. And I knocked on the door.  Everyone kinda knows me.  When I was asked "who was I" I realized this wasn't my friend.  

She opened the door (a very different person than I expected) and she told me to come in.  People are very gracious and hospitable in this culture so although I explained the situation and said I was going back home, she kept telling me to come in.  I decided it was going to be more polite to accept her invitation than flee in the face of embarrassment.  


Her six year old son was home for lunch.  His mom was cooking and set the table for him and my two year old.  Families don't often all eat at the same time.  Parents help or feed kids so they just eat at a different time.  So my little little man and this six year old ate together while I held my baby and tried to ignore the six year old's thoughts on me being at his house (he wasn't over the moon with my two year old sometimes using his hands to put food in his mouth, him not having his mom's whole attention and hearing my odd accent and sometimes having to ask him to repeat things.)  I think we (the six year old and me) ended on good terms after we played a game of Chinese checkers.  The woman  was a wonderful host to us "unannounced visitors."  It could have been an awkward situation (ok there were still a few awkward moments) but I think I have a new friend (the mom and hopefully the six year old too) from it all.  We had some nice conversations and I've promised the little boy that he can come upstairs anytime to play with our toys, trains, and get help with his English homework.        

I love to see good come out of awkwardness.  I hope you have a blessed day and that your awkward moments are redeemed and that you can find ways to bless others intentionally and maybe also unexpectedly.

Thanks for reading and stopping by.